All romantics know that the honeymoon period of relationships are rom com-certified thrill rides. Even so, initial perfection doesn’t mean that red flags don’t exist. Having one or two unpleasant qualities don’t necessarily signal the apocalypse, but some are too alarming to dismiss or accept. When should you stay, and when should you get out?
Be wary of these six signs that your relationship may not be the happy ending you’ve been dreaming about:
Sparks can fly when your eyes first meet, but sparks don’t always lead to a long-term relationship. Build a good foundation first by getting to know each other, including your goals and romantic needs. A good partner will take the time to do this, even if it’s only for a few weeks. A suspicious partner will grab the quickest chance to be taken (again), which means that you could just be a rebound or, even worse, an exercise in control and manipulation.
It’s worrisome when you don’t know what’s going on in your partner’s head because they’re not telling you anything at all, especially when it comes to their deepest feelings and beliefs. Conversing, listening, and understanding are some of the most significant components of a healthy intimate relationship. So, if your SO prefers to close themselves off whether you’re in a serious argument or a fun, casual discussion, you won’t be able to form that deep emotional connection needed for your relationship to work.
Say your SO does communicate with you. Great! Too bad it’s only ever about how awful their previous flames were. Sure, they’ve probably had a few unfortunate experiences. However, consistently degrading and complaining about each of their exes and their mothers could be a sign that the problem lies with them and not with other people. If that’s the case, you’ll definitely be next on the blacklist should you decide to end things.
As the saying goes, relationships are two-way streets. You and your partner should exert a reciprocated amount of effort, and both should have your perspectives respected, even in the little things. If your partner fails to make you feel valued and seen because they always point the spotlight to themselves, it could mean that they don’t regard you — and thus, the relationship — highly at all.
Having flaws and making mistakes is inevitable. Still, most conflicts are resolvable when you’re able to take responsibility for any damage caused and move forward together. This comes with maturity, self-awareness, and a readiness to be selfless, which partners who don’t own up to their wrongdoings lack. Stick with someone like this, and you’re merely going to gather bricks and build unbreakable walls between the two of you.
Being with another person is never 100 percent easy, but it shouldn’t feel like an endless, confusing burden even when it’s supposed to be going well. The right people will be happy to stick with you and help you grow even through the toughest of times. The wrong one will tear you down and make sure you know how troublesome it is to maintain the relationship. If your SO makes you feel insecure about yourself and the love they supposedly have for you, it’s time to leave.
Keeping an eye out for dangerous signs in your romantic relationships will save you a lot of time, energy, and heartbreak. When the red flags pile up and can’t be changed, pack up and go! You deserve to have the best partner you can find. Meet someone new or reconnect with an old friend, and maybe you’ll have the chance to discover a beautiful new life together – one worth keeping.